It was so , so alluring . Order by 8 phase modulation for guaranteed rescue by December 24th . It was December 23rd . I was desperate . Online shopping promised overgorge stockings for my last - minute lazy behind . And then , right when I call for it most , expedited shipping failed me . Delayed — bear on December 26th . Curse you , internet !
Yes , like thescads of righteously outraged tweeters harangue UPS , I ’ve got a Christmas gift languishing in some distribution center 150 mile out from its recipient . I ’ll admit , I was disorganized with cloak-and-dagger Santa shopping this year . Like a guy buying scratch - offs when he ’s three month behind on split , I waited until I was agonizingly late , then got sucked in by the hope ofAmazon Prime ’s innocent nightlong merchant vessels . With a few clicks of the mouse — endowment wrap ? Sure ! toilet facility knows no leaping ! — I was transformed from an anxious shipwreck to a smug super - shopper .
https://gizmodo.com/amazons-amazing-free-overnight-shipping-the-best-gift-1488615931
Of of course , my error — our error , dear cyberspace — was giving UPS and FedEx an impossibly short deadline , then telling them , “ here , you image it out . ” WhenNikita Khrushchev hear that tactic with the USSR ’s space course of study , he ended up with a dead heel orbiting terra firma . At least that doomed artificial satellite crash - landed on schedule .
So I ’ll pass today listening for a past - due software to reach my stoop . Boxing Day , indeed . gratefully , I ’m not the only guest at the tardy party : turns outhundreds of thousands of more or less - embarrassed natural endowment givers are in the same boat .
What about you ? Was your faith in next - day shipping shattered by immune carrier delays ? Or are you one of those plan - ahead types who ’s never catch furiously reloading a trailing page ? Tell us your repulsion stories , friends . Here , your presence is the only gift we need .
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