Salutations , my pensive stamp meters . In honor of Prometheus 2 : The Search for Michael Fassbender ’s Severed Head ’s atomic number 79 , I bring you an reply to the bountiful mystery in the Alien universe . Plus , the best Game of Thrones episode , the age riddle of both Gotham and the Star Wars prequels , and … ( dun dun dunh ) I know the last which wait me . Do n’t desire to miss that !
Hug It Out
TonyC :
I ’ve always wondered if a Facehugger could habituate … um , other orifices … to implant an conceptus ? I intend the interior of the host is the same disregarding of which end the baby Alien is introduce , right ?
Well , it ’s all “ interior , ” but the two close are , uh , moderately different . I mean , at the most basic level , victuals become in one floor and out the other .
In terms of Chestbusters , theFacehuggerdeposits its — well , it ’s not actually an egg , but we ’ll get to that in a moment — burden in the innkeeper ’s gorge , which is of course the vacuum tube that carries food from our throat to the stomach . It ’s recollective , but not very wide — only 3/4s of an inch — but remember , somehow the Chestburster pay heed out in there for several hours before popping through its host ’s sternum .
As to what the Facehugger really set , here ’s the canon allot toa 1993 issue of the official Aliens cartridge :
While the terms “ fecundation ” and “ implantation ” are liberally used to describe this process , they are not rigorously accurate ; studies byLasalle Bionationalhave testify that no genuine fertilized egg is inserted into the host . rather , the infant Xenomorph begin its life as a knot of specifically tailored cancers that bring about chemogenetic restructuring of the boniface ’s cell , fundamentally “ building ” the Chestburster from the host ’s own biological material at a cellular story .
The Facehugger deposits what it essentially a tumor in your esophagus , which then co - prefer its legion ’s cells , and develop into the priapic critter we all be intimate and fright .
So while there has been no documented slip of a Facehugger hugging a butt in the huge Aliens expanded world , I palpate dependable in saying there is 100 percent no cause why a Chestbuster could n’t or would n’t leave from being imbed anally . It would fit in the rectum much more easily than the esophagus , as it ’s a wider distance . The Alien tumor could co - opt cells just as easily from there as up top . This “ Buttbuster ” would n’t even get any extra discomfort , because the thing we 100 percent have a go at it aboutChestbustersfrom the movies is that it outride modest and only grows to full - size a few minutes before nascency , which is why hosts finger fine until it just about to incubate / claw its way of life out of your flesh .
Note : You have love my Google search history to blaze with this question , TonyC.
Age Is Just a Number
Very Confused :
Dear Mr. Postman , Gotham seems determined to disassociate itself from the account of the Batman series . I ’m certain you could think of plenty of good example of the serial ’ entertaining mitt waving around Batman continuity . However , its exercise set - up backs itself into a corner . Oswald Cobblepot and Edward Nygma are in their belated 20s or early 30s in Gotham . Yet the viewer is also supposed to believe they ’re around long enough to eventually have problems as The Penguin and The Riddler for the presently 10- or 12 - year - older Bruce Wayne when he finally assumes the Batman drapery .
But Selina Kyle a.k.a . the future Catwoman is also the same age as “ Gotham ” ’s Bruce Wayne . So how can the Batman and these future villains all be around the same age by the clock time of the “ Batman ” comics ?
Please , please , please do not vex about Gotham adhere to any part of Batman continuity . Just … do n’t . That way lies rage . Honestly , the ages might be one of the least problematic parts of the show , because very few of Batman ’s villains really take to be Bruce ’s age .
Let ’s say for restraint ’s sake that in Gotham Bruce is 15 and Penguin and Riddler are 30 . The approximation of Penguin and Riddler being 40 when Batman is 25 is all right by me ; it ’s not like these two were ever his most physical of foeman . Additionally , Catwoman being 25 is no job whatsoever . Mr. Freeze would be 45 , which is cool ( feel loose to judge if that pun was intended ) , since he ’s augment by his suit and suspend ray enough that it would be a decent fight . Scarecrow would be 30 , Mad Hatter would be around 35 , and Hugo Strange would be push 60 , but again , these foes mostly mess with Batman ’s mind . Even if they were Bruce ’s age , they could n’t put up a physical scrap anyway , so why not have them be older ? Two - Face would be 40 , assume Gotham ever has Harvey Dent show up again , but his basal arm is shooting people . Even the Joker ’s years — which would be roughly 30 — is okay , although everything else about Gotham ’s version of him is utterly bonkers .
But then you have Poison Ivy . I ’d say she ’s physically about 25 in in the show , which would make her 35 … but then you have to remember she was maturate up by a tiptop - creepy-crawly mutant power so when Bruce is 25 she would have the mind of a 22 - year - old . THIS IS disconcerting . Azrael would actually be 50 … if he had n’t been charge with a rocket launcher .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kakblvktqdg
Plus , please recall that Bruce has had basically two week of Batman training over the last years ; future GCPD commissioner Jim Gordon has murdered about a million people and worked for malefactor a great deal ; and god knows what find if Gotham really does make Barbara Kean into Harley Quinn , as she would not only be 40 but several age senior than the Joker and would have once been engaged to Gordon . And at the moment , the only reason it appears that this Bruce may be approaching Batman - ness is because the Court of Owls want him to .
Look . I ’ve read before that Gotham is the least exact Batman adaptation of all time — I love it , but not only is it definitely doing its own thing , it seems to be go out of its way to shatter Bat - continuity wherever it can . You ’ve make to let it go , because Gotham did about midway through time of year one .
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QK_fyWqlcCM
Home Is Where the Hard Is
John N. :
Kind of cribbing this off a comment I made on another io9 clause , but is it hipster - y of me to recollect “ Hardhome ” is better than “ Battle of the Bastards ” ? shortly after it air so many people were saying “ Battle of the Bastards ” was the right GoT episode ever ( and then “ Winds of Winter ” aired and then masses suppose THAT was the good installment ever ) . Maybe everyone was just amazed at what they just look on , but even right after I finished watching “ BotB ” I did n’t call up it was as good as “ Hardhome . ”
I ’ll by all odds let in that technically / cinematically “ BotB ” is unmatched , but the sense of surprisal and apprehension and suspense I stupefy from “ Hardhome ” was just on another level . Is this like … an fine opinion or is it go steady as a little too contrarian ?
I do n’t think it ’s hipster - y of you at all . It may be going against popular opinion , but unless you think yourself top-notch - fucking - nerveless for reckon “ Hardhome ” is well than the choice of the plebes , it ’s not like “ Hardhome ” is an constitutional gluten - devoid quadruple IPA vinyl group velocipede of an episode . Also ? “ Battle of the Bastards ” is the episode where Jon Snow run around a serviceman - roll .
But here ’s a fun fact : I think “ Hardhome ” is better , too . I think “ conflict of the Bastards ” is a monumental , heroic fight scene , and it ’s incredible , and it ’s fabulously put - together , and the panic of seeing Jon Snow suffocate in the mountain of body is nonrational as the pits . But . Yes , it ’s a massive , heroic fighting prospect but it ’s in the main a spectacle , which Game of Thrones does regularly . In term of storytelling , the conflict is just one recollective prologue to one simple bit of information : Jon beats Ramsay .
But “ Hardhome ” is so much more than that . Yes , it ’s massive and epic , give how many actors are involved , and yes , there is fighting , but it ’s not just another battle . It ’s more of a walloping , and the amount of information it packs in there is staggering . It singlehandedly provides more information about the cryptic White Walkers than all of GRRM ’s books put together — their organization , their powers , their utter inhumanity — and take in them just terrifying . It does so much hard lifting in regard to the White Walkers that it found their threat totally and permanently . They could only show up in the series finale and they ’ll still be scary alone because of “ Hardhome . ”
But for me , what makes it so much more impressive than any other Game of Thrones episode is how meticulously it ’s construct . I could babble about how utterly the tautness resurrect with the Wildling negotiation , how the dispute is settled to give character and viewers alike a fake sending of security , and the way the White Walkers ’ attack builds easy but exponentially , set forth with shout out off in the aloofness and ending with Jon Snow ’s utter desperation as he sees every exclusive one of his fall ally conjoin the White Walkers ’ army — and I have done so in the past tense — but I can remember being increasingly stupefy by each new second . eccentric in point : I have watch “ Battle of the Bastards ” twice ; I have watch over “ Hardhome ” at least 20 times , and I never get less impressed .
https://gizmodo.com/what-the-game-of-thrones-tv-show-is-doing-so-much-bette-1708510125
My point is that next season Game of Thrones will absolutely have a battle — maybe more than one — that will be even more epic that “ Battle of the Bastards . ” But it ’s going to have to sour very , very hard to create something that equal “ Hardhome , ” which stunned me with its excellence as a critic , but also made my jaw dip for about 20 full minute as a fan .
Age Is Just a Number: Episode II
-Jeff :
Hello Mr Postman , my 7- , 5- and 2- year olds are obsessed with Star Wars and incessantly are learn Episode V ( we ’re good parents ! ) and episodes I - III ( well , perchance not ) . They are SUPER obnubilate how Anakin is a kid in ep . 1 and demolish on a late teen / former XX princess , but in ep . 2 he looks elder than her .
My wife ( who dislikes sci - fi ) came up with a mind - blowing theory ( at least to me ): the case of human - alien that Anakin was ages quicker than other human character aliens . She then posited that the same was true for Luke in ep . IV , he look like he might be about 20 but acts like an early adolescent . Thoughts on an accelerated age process for the mintage that Anakin and Word are a phallus of ?
sad , but all humans in the Star Wars coltsfoot are humans . According toWookiepedia , the new canon states that humans originated on Coruscant , but theonly citation I can findto this is that number from the Star Wars : Uprising wandering secret plan , which is of course of study 100 percent canyon like everything else is , but seems a weird place to drop this reasonably authoritative snatch of knowledge .
On the other bridge player , perhaps it ’s pensive of humanity in Star Wars , in that they ’re so prevalent throughout the galaxy no one really give care about where they originated from . perchance the Star Wars team also thought it was no big deal , and threw it in a cellphone game . Why , it ’s almost like the collective Star Wars galaxy , fictional and real , knows that not everything needs an descent , and sometimes leaving something cryptic is good than any answer ( cough Anakin Boba Fett C-3PO the prequels cough ) .
So I ’m afraid this blows a hole in your wife ’s theory . But think back , Padme is speculate to be 14 in Phantom Menace , while Anakin is 9 ; Attack of the Clones is set 10 year later , which make Anakin 19 in it , and is certainly long enough for him to tally puberty and add up out the other side . Also , Natalie Portman was 16 - 17 when Episode 1 was being filmed , so playing 14 was n’t a stint ; meanwhile Hayden Christian was 19 - 20 when filming Attack of the Clones , so Anakin being 19 there also checks out .
Is it baffling that George Lucas would decide to make Anakin a minor minor and limn Luke and Leia ’s mom as a young teenager in Episode 1 , but then in the next movie have a grad school Padme splice a college freshman Anakin ? IT SURE IS . But in terms of the pic , the material discrepancy here is that in the 10 years between the two prequels , Padme appears to have only mature about a week , while Anakin in reality did grow up .
Death Comes to io9-Town
Wheelerguy :
All of a sudden I fall into a Final Destination curve ball and it made me wonder : what if you and the remainder of io9 ’s staffers past and present cease up in a Final Destination scenario ? Like , who do you recollect would be first in the bar , and how do you guess would it act out ? Is it gon na be as cheesy and campy as the films or more elusive and ambiguous ?
Jameswould be playing with his umteen million Nipponese action figures , would slip and manage to prod his center with one of their swords , reel in botheration , free fall and dig himself on yet another arm accoutrement , and repeat this until he run to demise .
Germainwould be catch a movie for review when the motion picture projector would overheat and catch flak , limit the whole theater ablaze ; when he prove to leave all the doors would be block by giant palettes of The Emoji Movie promotional fabric .
Bethwould have a jet railway locomotive fall on her on her way of life to the office , from a plane that should have been carry an indie comic artist from another res publica to a US con , but was inexplicably and shittily deny ingress .
Evanwould be beheaded by his PS4 force out a review copy of a TV game at 800 miles per hour .
Cheryl ’s flat building , which is already super - taken up in genuine life history , would kill her , almost certainly by an elaborate series of events knocking her into the basement ’s overt furnace .
Charleswould steal on a comedian on the top of self-aggrandising stairs at the Gizmodo Media part , collapse his head on every fifth whole step ( there are a plenty of them ) and then , upon landing on the lower floor , a safe will fall on him .
Katharinewould see a major Star Trek continuity error in a succeeding Discovery laggard , and have an aneurism . ( frankly , this may materialize anyway . )
Finally , Iwill be drive my auto when I accidentally enter a shot being filmed for a Michael Bay Transformers pic . The monumental machine used to serve as Grimlock will effectively grab my machine in its jaw , crushing it , but not stamp out me outright . Grimlock will throw the shipwreck to the ground , at which head a variety of Autobots will expel their robot bodily fluids on me . in the end , a vengeful Michael Bay will rig me and my shattered railroad car so that it explode for a full 60 minutes . This will be included in aggregate — as one uninterrupted blastoff — in Transformers 6 : What the Fuck Ever .
I ’m low-pitched on mail , gang , which may or may not be because sometimes while wandering the post - apocalyptical wasteland chain armour is all I have to use up . Please mail your queries , mysteries , disputes that need resolution , advice that needs to be given , etc . to[email protect ] !
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